Doomed with a Disability

I work in the field of human resources, and I occasionally deal with employee disability issues. Managers will sometimes ask me what qualifies as a disability; I usually point them to definitions such as "an employee who has an impairment or perceived impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities." I've thought about this several times and have realized something scary: I will soon be classified as disabled. In fact, I may already be considered disabled, especially living in Utah. Let me tell you why: First of all, I am very short. I am only 5'6". Although not considered a midget, in time I will be one. The reason is obvious: the U.S. population will continue to get taller while I remain the same or get shorter. The average male height in 1900 was 5'6", but because of better eating, stricter limitations on immigration, and giants in Utah, the average U.S. man is currently 5'10". In about 50 years I predict the average male height to be 6'5", and I will be at least a foot shorter than that by then.

I am especially under the average height here in Utah. I walk through the grocery stores amidst giants, both male and female. Several months ago my brother and I were marveling over the number of women over 6'0". Every guy out here is at least 6'0" while most are much taller. I swim through a sea of legs as I try to get to the front of a line.

Finally, a 'perceived disability,' is just that - one of perception. In New Jersey I wouldn't be perceived as being disabled, but in other parts of the country, people would consider me disabled--unable to perform basic activities like slamming a basketball.

So I am here to predict that at some point in the future I will be classified as disabled, unable to do the normal things that all you other giants can do. But hey, at least I will have a parking pass.